on transition...

So, a week from today marks my final Sunday on staff at Hope Community Church.
Many people have asked how I am feeling about it all, to them I usually give a variety of answers. I don't want to seem ambiguous about my emotions, but in all honesty, my emotions seem to be changing with every passing hour at times. There are a ton of folks who I will miss dearly from Hope. I would like to think that "of course, I'll see them again," but the truth is, it might be very difficult to do so. I have a mixture of excitement and sadness. Part of me is a little anxious to be stepping out of a secure job and constant paycheck and into something relatively unknown (especially long-term). But, I do believe that God will provide and truly does have bigger plans for my life than I can imagine. This is sometimes hard to see, let alone feel, but that adds to the excitement of it all. All in all, I could not be more thankful for Hope and the way I have been able to serve, grow and learn while being there.

Farewell...

Tomorrow a good friend takes off on a plane for half way around the world... No cell phone, no suitcase, and no set schedule accompany this man - only freedom.

Tomorrow my wife also leaves for the day. She goes off to a job she loves and in a career that she is committed to joyfully because of what she brings to others, and the gift that serving them is to her. Although cell phone, papers, and work bag go along with her... so does a distinct freedom.

What must a man do to be 'free' if it seems like freedom means two nearly diametrically opposed things?

Hopefully the blog entries that follow might offer me (and you) some clarity on these questions.
I just hope that it is not another 6 months before my next post.

Reflections on BBQ and Brimstone...

Yesterday, I was sitting under the tracks of the MindEraser at Elitch Gardens, and with the noise of joyfully screaming youngsters in the background - I posed a question to my friend Sean.

I asked what his thoughts on experiencing God in worship were recently.

Among his answers (very insightful and honest), he noted that part of his time in worship is spent simply asking the question: "am I living the way I should be?"

I made a mental note about how it struck me when Sean said this simple line. I began to realize that so often I over-think worship and how we are to encounter the living God. I often think of reflection of Sean's nature as regulatory, guilt-filled and legalistic. But really, is there anything that can lead more to freedom and peace than tossing all of ones life before God and letting him pick through it and gently let me know what is good for me and what is not?

I realize that this is much easier said than done. I feel that most folks don't need someone to tell them that they have done things that are wrong, but instead someone to create a space for them to process their life and decisions - good and bad. I also found something so simple, deep and beautiful about Sean's insight, and even with the antiquated, evangelical images that this notion conjured up in my mind.

I realize that there have been many wounds and misconceptions doled out by the traditional, "are you livin' right with God?," preacher. But, there is a beauty in simply reflecting on a daily basis on such questions:

Am I living/loving like Jesus?
Am I giving all I can to the poor and those in need?
Am I giving my heart to my wife, kids, or friends as much as I should?
Where do my daily priorities fall?

Quite often I feel I could be quite satisfied and fulfilled singing a few hymns and hearing a simple message at a quaint country church, shooting the breeze and asking the above questions with good friends over a beer and BBQ that afternoon.

In theory and practice, is post-post-modern synonymous with post simplicity?